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blue_bells» Title: Saloon Sidetrack
» Fandom: Supernatural
» Warnings: AU, Cracktastic
» Pairing(s)/Characters: Sam/Lucifer, Dean, Castiel and Gabriel
» Summary: A Western!AU wherein Castiel is a barman, Dean is sheriff, Sam is his deputy and Lucifer is a wanted man.
» A/N: Written here for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
partofthequeue2 in ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
comment_fic.
"Thank y'all for coming, Sam. Dean."
The Sheriff hooked his thumbs in his belt loops and surveyed the carousing saloon population. It was a larger crowd that night and Sheriff Dean Winchester bet it had something to do with the camp of visitors that had rolled into town just the day before.
They called themselves 'The Travelling Host', whatever that meant.
"That's all right, Castiel," Dean drawled, "You said you had a lead for us?"
Castiel wiped his hands on the apron tied at his waist, Deputy Sam Winchester craned to listen over the din when Castiel spared a look behind them at his patrons, his voice tight.
"Let me get the law brothers a drink, don't want people thinking you're here for nothin' other than your loyal patronage," Castiel drew away to the back wall before Sam could refuse.
Sam tipped his hat, sighing and his brother raised his eyebrows at him; Sam knew that it was his nervous twitch. Dean's lips pursed, eyes narrowing as he took another look over their company, but Sam's attention was drawn towards the stage where a bright piano tune had begun to play.
A young woman with her dark hair pinned high took to the white-lacquered stage. Red-gloved hands folded at the waist of her deep red dress as she sang of slow, wonderful seduction. When she met Sam's eye, her full lips bloomed with a knowing smile and she winked before looking away.
Sam grunted, folding over the elbow that jabbed his ribs.
"Don't go there, Sammy," Dean said, "We've talked about this. Ruby and her whole family are the reason we're kept so busy."
"Dean, that's just a rumour --"
"I hauled her crazy bun of a mother into jail last week for 'intimidating' the other show girls and her daddy's been carving up livestock that don't belong to him."
Sam sighed, his heart heavy that Ruby suffered for the sins of Lilith and Alastair. "That's not fair to --"
"Here you go, boys," Castiel returned, pushing two large glasses of bourbon and ice towards them.
Sam frowned deeply at his glass. "I don't drink that."
Castiel leaned close over the counter looking far too intent and serious for the brothers to resist leaning in as well.
"I ask for your discretion," Castiel paused, searching for the words, "Based on your descriptions, this could be dangerous and I don't want my patrons getting hurt."
Dean tucked his glass close to his chest. "Is it the man who attacked us?"
"Yes," Castiel nodded tightly and glanced down the bar. "He came in an hour ago, the one at the end with this drink. I think he's the man that took a shot at you boys after the Host came to town."
Sam and Dean followed Castiel's direction past the other patrons bent or fallen over their drinks where a man in a grey coat and cowboy hat was rolling his two-thirds empty glass between his palms on the bartop.
Dean cleared his throat when they stepped up behind the suspect. "'Scuse the interruption, partner. We'd like a few minutes of your time."
The man looked over his shoulder, dark brown eyes narrowed under the long brim of that hat. He dusty blond hair cut short and before he turned on his stool, Sam noticed the silver spurs of his brown leather boots.
"Ah... the Sheriff and the Deputy," The man smiled between them and tipped his hat up before resting his elbows behind him on the counter. "This is an honour."
"There was a convenience store heist yesterday, perishable goods were taken and someone let off shots at me and my Deputy here," Dean nodded at his brother, his voice flat as he smiled in that humourless way that encouraged most criminals to a quick confession. "We're interviewing all new persons in town, Mister.... "
"Lucifer," the man supplied and addressed Sam with a long, examining look from head to toe. Sam did not like Lucifer's slow, suggestive smile. "Just Lucifer."
Dean's face pinched in careful recognition. "Lucifer? The Western Morningstar?"
Lucifer laughed under his breath and reached back for his drink. "Just Lucifer is fine. You can thank Sheriff Crowley of Kansas for the other title. He needed something longer to justify the larger bounty he negotiated with the bank for my head."
The Sheriff and Deputy exchanged a bewildered look and Dean's eyebrows appealed 'is this guy for real?'
Sam didn't understand why a man with five hundred thousand dollars on his head was so relaxed. "Sir, are you aware that you're a wanted man in seven states?"
"Only seven?" Lucifer frowned in gentle, but genuine disappointment. "Call me 'Lucifer', Sam."
"Today you could make it eight," Dean growled, "Where were you yesterday at 2PM, Mister Lucifer?"
"Oh, it was me."
Sam stuttered, "I'm sorry?"
Lucifer shrugged a shoulder. "You've nothing to apologise for. I'm the one who shot at you."
Sam cleared his throat, stunned, almost dizzy. He eventually shook his head and reached for Lucifer's arm. "We're going to have to take you into custody."
"Oh, I shot the Sheriff," Lucifer easily admitted, then pointed at Sam, "But I didn't shoot you, Deputy."
Dean's lip curled. "Well, ya missed --"
"Wait, there was another shooter?"
Lucifer studied Sam's face and Sam bristled against the soft, considering look in his eyes. Sam pushed his shoulders back and stretched to his full, impressive height. The polished, sawed-off Winchester glimmered in its holster on his hip.
"Michael," Lucifer finally said, "His name's Michael. He's the godfather of the Travelling Host, but he's not here tonight. I was hoping to get off one good shot at him before I left town."
Dean's next words stalled in his throat because the saloon doors swung open with a thunderous bang. The bar erupted with screams and cries of confusion as the piano and song abruptly stopped, wood whining on wood as patrons scrambled for cover under tables and chairs.
A man stood in the open doorway, hands cocking a still-smoking rifle. His eyes shone with mirth and his lips were quirked in amusement as he scanned the disarray. His eyes passed right by the town authority at the bar.
"Ease down, everybody. This is a hold up," The man announced, shooting off instructions to anyone who had come that night bearing a penny's worth of value.
Dean reached for the rifle under his coat and leaned towards Lucifer who was still reclining against the bar.
"Is that Michael?"
Lucifer hummed in the negative. "Gabriel. The convenience store thief. He has a sweet tooth."
Sam stared at him. "Just how many of you are there?"
Lucifer's glass didn't reach his lips, he raised it at Sam in warning. "Let the record show, I am not with them. I only came to collect my niece for the big city."
Lucifer nodded at the stage where Ruby cowered by the piano. Ruby noticed them watching and waved with a nervous smile when Lucifer raised his glass to her.
Dean rolled his eyes at his brother and hissed under his breath. "Now do you believe me? That whole family, man!"
» Fandom: Supernatural
» Warnings: AU, Cracktastic
» Pairing(s)/Characters: Sam/Lucifer, Dean, Castiel and Gabriel
» Summary: A Western!AU wherein Castiel is a barman, Dean is sheriff, Sam is his deputy and Lucifer is a wanted man.
» A/N: Written here for
partofthequeue2 in comment_fic. "Thank y'all for coming, Sam. Dean."
The Sheriff hooked his thumbs in his belt loops and surveyed the carousing saloon population. It was a larger crowd that night and Sheriff Dean Winchester bet it had something to do with the camp of visitors that had rolled into town just the day before.
They called themselves 'The Travelling Host', whatever that meant.
"That's all right, Castiel," Dean drawled, "You said you had a lead for us?"
Castiel wiped his hands on the apron tied at his waist, Deputy Sam Winchester craned to listen over the din when Castiel spared a look behind them at his patrons, his voice tight.
"Let me get the law brothers a drink, don't want people thinking you're here for nothin' other than your loyal patronage," Castiel drew away to the back wall before Sam could refuse.
Sam tipped his hat, sighing and his brother raised his eyebrows at him; Sam knew that it was his nervous twitch. Dean's lips pursed, eyes narrowing as he took another look over their company, but Sam's attention was drawn towards the stage where a bright piano tune had begun to play.
A young woman with her dark hair pinned high took to the white-lacquered stage. Red-gloved hands folded at the waist of her deep red dress as she sang of slow, wonderful seduction. When she met Sam's eye, her full lips bloomed with a knowing smile and she winked before looking away.
Sam grunted, folding over the elbow that jabbed his ribs.
"Don't go there, Sammy," Dean said, "We've talked about this. Ruby and her whole family are the reason we're kept so busy."
"Dean, that's just a rumour --"
"I hauled her crazy bun of a mother into jail last week for 'intimidating' the other show girls and her daddy's been carving up livestock that don't belong to him."
Sam sighed, his heart heavy that Ruby suffered for the sins of Lilith and Alastair. "That's not fair to --"
"Here you go, boys," Castiel returned, pushing two large glasses of bourbon and ice towards them.
Sam frowned deeply at his glass. "I don't drink that."
Castiel leaned close over the counter looking far too intent and serious for the brothers to resist leaning in as well.
"I ask for your discretion," Castiel paused, searching for the words, "Based on your descriptions, this could be dangerous and I don't want my patrons getting hurt."
Dean tucked his glass close to his chest. "Is it the man who attacked us?"
"Yes," Castiel nodded tightly and glanced down the bar. "He came in an hour ago, the one at the end with this drink. I think he's the man that took a shot at you boys after the Host came to town."
Sam and Dean followed Castiel's direction past the other patrons bent or fallen over their drinks where a man in a grey coat and cowboy hat was rolling his two-thirds empty glass between his palms on the bartop.
Dean cleared his throat when they stepped up behind the suspect. "'Scuse the interruption, partner. We'd like a few minutes of your time."
The man looked over his shoulder, dark brown eyes narrowed under the long brim of that hat. He dusty blond hair cut short and before he turned on his stool, Sam noticed the silver spurs of his brown leather boots.
"Ah... the Sheriff and the Deputy," The man smiled between them and tipped his hat up before resting his elbows behind him on the counter. "This is an honour."
"There was a convenience store heist yesterday, perishable goods were taken and someone let off shots at me and my Deputy here," Dean nodded at his brother, his voice flat as he smiled in that humourless way that encouraged most criminals to a quick confession. "We're interviewing all new persons in town, Mister.... "
"Lucifer," the man supplied and addressed Sam with a long, examining look from head to toe. Sam did not like Lucifer's slow, suggestive smile. "Just Lucifer."
Dean's face pinched in careful recognition. "Lucifer? The Western Morningstar?"
Lucifer laughed under his breath and reached back for his drink. "Just Lucifer is fine. You can thank Sheriff Crowley of Kansas for the other title. He needed something longer to justify the larger bounty he negotiated with the bank for my head."
The Sheriff and Deputy exchanged a bewildered look and Dean's eyebrows appealed 'is this guy for real?'
Sam didn't understand why a man with five hundred thousand dollars on his head was so relaxed. "Sir, are you aware that you're a wanted man in seven states?"
"Only seven?" Lucifer frowned in gentle, but genuine disappointment. "Call me 'Lucifer', Sam."
"Today you could make it eight," Dean growled, "Where were you yesterday at 2PM, Mister Lucifer?"
"Oh, it was me."
Sam stuttered, "I'm sorry?"
Lucifer shrugged a shoulder. "You've nothing to apologise for. I'm the one who shot at you."
Sam cleared his throat, stunned, almost dizzy. He eventually shook his head and reached for Lucifer's arm. "We're going to have to take you into custody."
"Oh, I shot the Sheriff," Lucifer easily admitted, then pointed at Sam, "But I didn't shoot you, Deputy."
Dean's lip curled. "Well, ya missed --"
"Wait, there was another shooter?"
Lucifer studied Sam's face and Sam bristled against the soft, considering look in his eyes. Sam pushed his shoulders back and stretched to his full, impressive height. The polished, sawed-off Winchester glimmered in its holster on his hip.
"Michael," Lucifer finally said, "His name's Michael. He's the godfather of the Travelling Host, but he's not here tonight. I was hoping to get off one good shot at him before I left town."
Dean's next words stalled in his throat because the saloon doors swung open with a thunderous bang. The bar erupted with screams and cries of confusion as the piano and song abruptly stopped, wood whining on wood as patrons scrambled for cover under tables and chairs.
A man stood in the open doorway, hands cocking a still-smoking rifle. His eyes shone with mirth and his lips were quirked in amusement as he scanned the disarray. His eyes passed right by the town authority at the bar.
"Ease down, everybody. This is a hold up," The man announced, shooting off instructions to anyone who had come that night bearing a penny's worth of value.
Dean reached for the rifle under his coat and leaned towards Lucifer who was still reclining against the bar.
"Is that Michael?"
Lucifer hummed in the negative. "Gabriel. The convenience store thief. He has a sweet tooth."
Sam stared at him. "Just how many of you are there?"
Lucifer's glass didn't reach his lips, he raised it at Sam in warning. "Let the record show, I am not with them. I only came to collect my niece for the big city."
Lucifer nodded at the stage where Ruby cowered by the piano. Ruby noticed them watching and waved with a nervous smile when Lucifer raised his glass to her.
Dean rolled his eyes at his brother and hissed under his breath. "Now do you believe me? That whole family, man!"
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no subject
Date: 2010-11-23 11:44 am (UTC)Can I merry you and eat the children?? :D Pretty much addore this whole idea, of the 'bunch o' a brothers'... It's like it was written for AU's to give birth, to awsome weirdo interactions <3
<3<3<3
Also, told ye' I would be goin' thorugh your old stuff no .D ?
no subject
Date: 2010-11-23 12:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-11-23 04:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-30 01:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-01 04:05 am (UTC)I'm pleased you enjoy Gabriel and collective shenanigans, thank you!